My dear Muslim bros...

Knowingly or unknowingly, wittingly or unwittingly, intentionally or unintentionally, I have done you a favour. I do not ask for anything in return except to read this post with care. You don't need to do anything good for me, bad...I leave it to your discretion. But I would like you to be nice to my GF. Just like me, my GF is also a true Muslim and so please forgive any trespasses as you would like a good Muslim. My GF always remembers a favour. May Allah be praised.

I repeat it

I'm not aligned with any and neither do I expect any preferential treatment from any. I know that by being like this I make a lot of friends and enemies. And I know that there are those within my own circle who is going to find this inconvenient and will be against me. And frankly it doesn't bother me.

Go back to the source. Not to a hole

I know the value of money. And what can be called the limits of human decency. That is why I turned down a job offer some days back. I was well aware that this is going to make my life pretty difficult, which has already gone overboard.

I never understood the sweat of my father when he paid for my college fees. So I didn't study well. Today, I know the value of a single rupee and that is why I even went on to donate a few thousand rupees to change a single life without telling my mom. And I didn't want some politician today who claims to be a hero or captain going further down in morals. The same one is today in bed with the one, antagonistic just a little bit earlier.

Thanks, but no thanks.

The finality of an action

I understood the power and finality of action (although not in a way that I liked that time), when my girl friend married another.

There are certain things in life which are irreversible (reminds me of the song of the Italian movie by that name) and there are certain things which are reversible (like going back to choose another way while driving).

My setting her free was merely a mock-up since I never in my wildest dreams thought that they she will even think of herself with another man. But I was thinking that she was just not in her right mind and she will soon understand what was happening.

When she told me that she was married, the curtain came down. People have different standards in different cultures when to know that a relationship is over, and even within a culture, it varies depending on the individual and in an individual itself, depending on the time and place. In the west, the same Demi Moore's standards vary in 'The Ghost' and the 'The Indecent Proposal'. For me, when my girl friend married another, it was the end.

Many times it came across my mind if I might go back to her. A few times I even searched for her just out of curiosity in social networks. But I always held that it is gone forever. that is why even when once I did find her on a social network, I didn't contact her. I also understood that she wouldn't really like to remember the old times and maybe she even fears me that I might harm her marriage out of anger. I was irked a little bit when I saw her display of affection to her father online after all we had gone through but then she was his daughter before my girl friend. Also, she is a very strong willed girl who was proud to be a Leo. These things wouldn't have really mattered if only we were right for each other.

The decisive action that she took or forced to take, though final, isn't as simple as could be taken in a moment and forgotten later. She had told me in her letters all along that she was getting pressurized everyday. Even when the problem came, things might have been salvaged if only I had also not blown up the trust she had had on me. But I don't blame myself because we were just not made for each other and she must have felt greatly relieved after having taken the decision to get out of the relationship. But then, it is not easy to forget in a day what was the dream of 3 years. It reminds me of the song in the movie 'Nenjil Oar Aalayam'...'Ninaipadhellaam Nadandhuvittaal...' and I (funnily) have to console myself with 'Engirundhaalum Vaazhga..'

Let me tell you, it was a tragedy (like BeeGees sings).

I don't know if this blog is like that of Anne Frank's diary or the room I stay in is like that of Adolf Hitler's underground bunker. I just don't care as long as infinity.

No offense to you, wouldn't mind if you let the psych in

Live in finite to live infinite

Two friends in deep trouble in their worldly lives went to see a Guru at an Ashram in a forest to get a solution. The Guru gave a set of instructions to follow. One of the two asked how long it will take to have all their problems solved. The Guru took them underneath a mango tree outside the Ashram.

He said, "Look at all these mangoes. Your problems will be solved when all the mangoes fall-off from the tree".

The first friend said, "Guruji, I'm thankful for your guidance. I find it plausible and within my capacity. Though there are numerous mangoes, it is still not endless and so oneday they will all have to fall oneday. I also like the ambiance of the mangrove and I will be happy to spend my days here."

The second friend thought a bit. Will what the Guru said work? What if he is a cheat and expects something in return in future? What if I cannot practice as is expected? And there are too many mangoes to fall off...surely there must be an easier way. So he said, "Guruji, I appreciate your advice. But I have to go now."

So the first friend stayed at the ashram while the second friend went back.

Some time later, the Guru had a visitor to the Ashram. It was the second friend, now battered, shattered, covered in dirt and emaciated.

The Guru asked him, "What happened to you?".

"Guruji, after my meeting with you, I went to many places to get a quick-fix solution to my problems. The pressure of the world kept getting at me as I went from one place to another for a magical cure. Some of them worked for some time but they were mere addictions which brought some other problem to me and I slid further down. I have just come back from hell and I hope you can give me some cure. I don't even mind waiting now."

The Guru said, "Okay. But you are in a very poor condition. First have this mango to satisfy your hunger."

The second friend had it with great relish. He said, "Nice mango...by the way, I would like to see my good old friend."

The Guru said, "You have just eaten him."

The second friend looked at the mango tree outside and there were no more any mangoes left on the tree.

Arvy, the sperm

There was once a sperm called Arvy. He had a lot of friends and went to gymnasium daily to strengthen himself to be the one to mate when the moment of love-making arrives. So he practised with great enthusiasm, discipline and regularity the austerities that was laid out. There were a lot of folks who were also interested and they too took up exercising. There were alliances and there were also competitions. And then the the post man called hormone, brought the long-awaited message. There was indeed increased activity and there was going to be a mass evacuation. Arvy broke into walk, a run, a marathon and finally a sprint as the he reached the gate. By now, he had left the other sperms a long distance back. Suddenly he heard a woman shouting and screaming. He lost his momentum, zeal and then even started perspiring and took a U-Turn. As he came back, the others asked him why he was returning back. He shouted, "This is no love. This is a rape. I do not want to be born as an unwanted child and curse tomorrow my Father for the act and my Mother for sending me to an orphanage. If you heed my advice, you also don't go out." And all of them stopped one by one. The would-be Father then sadly wondered why the pen is limp.