I have understood how my relationship with my ex girl friend had got wrong. So, now I know how I can prevent a future relationship with another girl from going wrong.
While it is embarrassing for me to write this publicly, I will go ahead since this is a very interesting and useful find someone can use.
I think my relationship deteriorated after I started masturbating. There are 2 issues to be answered when one fantasizes on one's girl friend or someone else. It's attention and affection.
1. If one masturbates thinking on someone other than one's own girl friend (or boy friend), one is taking attention away from her. Relationships, like many other things, grows with time spent on it.
2. Assuming one doesn't masturbate thinking on someone else but instead on one's own girl friend (or boy friend), one then doesn't really share affection because this is a one-person act. There is no point in sending a card or a hello on the phone because the hormones have left the body already to bring in the romance.
In my case, I 'discovered' masturbation oneday. I even made a joke to my friend that life has many surprises and like masturbation, one can find another revelation (which thankfully is true to me now as I live like a reborn). People and doctors will ofcourse keep debating on this and maybe there is room for debate if one doesn't want a single person romantic love relationship or even much interested in one.
This is not just a matter of romantic love relationship but is also a matter of the propriety of fantasizing on a third person. The third person or her or his partner might resent it. So when one does this, one is sowing seeds of sexual rivalry, jealousy etc. Free sex is something debatable. Just as no woman or man was heard to have complained about Rama's advances, no one seems to have complained of Krishna's acts. Maybe history or Hinduism is biased but in my opinion, it's a balance of quality, quantity and type. Rama had a wife who was solely and romantically devoted to Him and vice versa but Krishna had many with whom the romance was masked by spirituality and vice versa. I guess in this world, there is no one who is fully Rama or Krishna but everyone has some percentage of the 2 extremes. The same logic applies to females too. But then, Krishna came later than Rama. When Krishna came, the age was a lot worse or nasty or base than Rama's time. And today, it's perhaps at the all-time worst what with all sexual deviancies. But it is also said that one has to live like Rama and live as Krishna advised us to....which means...more of devotion to a single person and less of sensual wanderings.
While it is embarrassing for me to write this publicly, I will go ahead since this is a very interesting and useful find someone can use.
I think my relationship deteriorated after I started masturbating. There are 2 issues to be answered when one fantasizes on one's girl friend or someone else. It's attention and affection.
1. If one masturbates thinking on someone other than one's own girl friend (or boy friend), one is taking attention away from her. Relationships, like many other things, grows with time spent on it.
2. Assuming one doesn't masturbate thinking on someone else but instead on one's own girl friend (or boy friend), one then doesn't really share affection because this is a one-person act. There is no point in sending a card or a hello on the phone because the hormones have left the body already to bring in the romance.
In my case, I 'discovered' masturbation oneday. I even made a joke to my friend that life has many surprises and like masturbation, one can find another revelation (which thankfully is true to me now as I live like a reborn). People and doctors will ofcourse keep debating on this and maybe there is room for debate if one doesn't want a single person romantic love relationship or even much interested in one.
This is not just a matter of romantic love relationship but is also a matter of the propriety of fantasizing on a third person. The third person or her or his partner might resent it. So when one does this, one is sowing seeds of sexual rivalry, jealousy etc. Free sex is something debatable. Just as no woman or man was heard to have complained about Rama's advances, no one seems to have complained of Krishna's acts. Maybe history or Hinduism is biased but in my opinion, it's a balance of quality, quantity and type. Rama had a wife who was solely and romantically devoted to Him and vice versa but Krishna had many with whom the romance was masked by spirituality and vice versa. I guess in this world, there is no one who is fully Rama or Krishna but everyone has some percentage of the 2 extremes. The same logic applies to females too. But then, Krishna came later than Rama. When Krishna came, the age was a lot worse or nasty or base than Rama's time. And today, it's perhaps at the all-time worst what with all sexual deviancies. But it is also said that one has to live like Rama and live as Krishna advised us to....which means...more of devotion to a single person and less of sensual wanderings.